Tea and Crumpets with Chronos and Chaos
Claimer: I own everybody in this including myself. Get permission to
use them from me. I'm pretty giving so I shouldn't have a problem.
Thanks: To Tracey who inspired the idea, and to my own insanity.
*******
Chaos: Welcome to Tea and Crumpets, we're your hosts. I'm Chaos, the
Lord of Disorder and Destruction, Sworn Enemy of the Order of Time.
And that's Chronos, the Messenger Boy.
Chronos: Shut up, Little Boy Blue!
Chaos: Has-been!
Chronos: Never-was!
*Chaos and Chronos glare at each and get ready to fight*
Patti: Enough!
Chronos: Who the bloody hell are you?
Patti: I'm your creator, Patti.
Chaos: I thought our creator was named Ricia.
Patti: I am Ricia! Patricia or Patti or Ricia. See I'm called Patti
in RL and Ricia on the net. Patricia is my full name and...
*Chronos and Chaos have fallen asleep*
Patti: Wake up already! You've got a show to do!
Chaos: *groans* Why?
Patti: Because I said so! And I'm the master of you, Lord Chaos.
Chronos: Ha! She told you Chaos!
Patti: That goes for you too, Chronos!
*Chronos pouts while Chaos laughs*
Patti: Now start over and this time behave.
Chronos and Chaos: Yes oh mistress of all!
Patti: I'm going to pretend that wasn't sarcastic.
Chaos: You do that.
*cheesy music starts up*
Chronos: Now once again, welcome to Tea and Crumpets. We're your
hosts, Chronos and Chaos. On today's show we have...uh...what do we
have Chaos?
Chaos: Huh? I'm sorry I blanked out. What did you say?
Chronos: What's on today's show?
Chaos: How should I know? You're the organized one.
Chronos: You mean we have no guests??
Chaos: Guess not. More crumpets for us!
Chronos: Good point!
*they munch on crumpets and sip tea for awhile. Finally by cause of
sheer boredom Patti pushes on Erik and Vincent to be guests*
Chaos: Erik and Vincent? Who are they?
Chronos: The Sacrifice and the Victim.
Chaos: Oh that's pleasant! And you people are the good guys?
Vincent: You ate all the crumpets.
Erik: And drank all the tea.
Chronos: So? You're dead.
Erik: Doesn't mean we don't like crumpets.
Chaos: Well go buy your own. Now let's begin the interveiw.
So...Vincent, how does it feel to have no personality?
Vincent: I have a personality!
Chaos: No you don't!
Vincent: Yes I do! And I want some crumpets!
Chaos: I don't care what you want, you...who the hell are you again?
Chronos: He's the Victim. He was killed by the first Fedora
TimeKeeper, Sebastien.
Chaos: Why?
Chronos: He was in the way.
Chaos: The good guys, ladies and gentlemen. Nothing says 'we're the
heros of the stories" like senseless homicide.
Chronos: Shut up! At least we didn't try to destory all life and
twist the universe to our sick vision.
Chaos: No, the universe was already twisted to your sick vision.
Erik: Um...are we being interveiwed?
Vincent: C'mon Erik, lets go see if Patti has any more crumpets.
*they leave, our hosts bicker for awhile but then notice the guests
are gone*
Chaos: Hey where'd they go?
Chronos: Who cares. On our next show we'll be learning how to make a
thermal nuclear weapon from sawdust and chewing gum.
Chaos: We will?? Really?
Chronos: Probably not.
*cheesy music starts up*
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