Thingamiggies of Love and Weirdness Part One

Disclaimer: I don't own Aladdin or its characters...thank the Higher
Powers that I don't.

Warning: I've watched Aladdin and the King of Thieves four thousand
times in the last few days. I'm sleep
deprived, bored, wired on sugar and in a weird twisted mood. When
this happens I write bizarre things that
should not be written. Iago...Abu...slash. Don't like? Well then
you're more normal then I am.

Note: I am actually a very funny person but I'm not Robin Williams.
I've never even hoped to achieve the
level of Robin Williams. Ergo, I'm getting rid of the Genie real fast.

It had been your typical adventure. Get the mysterious magical
thingamajiggy before the mean nasty bad
people get it. Simple right? Right. So we'll skip straight to the
part where they're looking at the mysterious
magical thingamajiggy in the palace.

Aladdin looked at the thing with confusion, "So what exactly is this
thing supposed to do?"

Jasmine studied it, "There's an inscription."

"Oooh...", Genie quickly changed into Indiana Jones and put a
magnifying glass up to the thingamajiggy,
"This thingamajiggy is quite a find and might be cursed." A huge
boulder came chasing him away before he
could read anything.

Iago flinched, "Cursed? Is he serious?"

Abu squeaked something and Aladdin nodded, "We should read the
inscription to find out what this is
about...or for. 'Become another but stay the same and there your fate
does lie. But be but warned to
squander this, your love will surely..."

Jasmine looked at him, "Surely what?"

Aladdin frowned, "I don't know. It's scratched out."

Iago shrugged, "Who cares? It's made out of gold, why don't we just
melt it down and..."

Aladdin glared at him, "Don't be ridiculous. It's extremely powerful;
we can't just melt it down. This inscription is important."

Genie had appeared back again, "Hmmm...let me see that. Well
typically things like this tend to rhyme. So what rhymes with lie?
Bye, guy, high, my, nigh, pie...mmmm pie."

Iago snorted, "Your love will surely pie? Yeah that's it."

Genie zapped Iago, "I wasn't Die...that's not
very pleasant."

Jasmine's eyes widened, "Your love will surely die?"

Aladdin dropped the thingamajiggy, as if he'd just discovered
something sticky and nasty on it. Abu and Iago, being the greedy
creatures they are, both made a grab for it before it hit the ground.
Needless to say the thingamajiggy was activated, magical light and
stuff flashed around the room and all flaming hell broke

Abu groaned and sat up. Something didn't feel quite right. He looked

And promptly screamed.

He was...human. How had this happened?, "How...?", he froze. Was that
his voice? He tried again,"Aladdin? Iago? What happened?"

Aladdin rushed over, "Abu...this is too strange. We think the
thingamajiggy must've done this. Genie and Jasmine are looking
through some old books to try to find a way to fix this. I'm going to
join them...don't worry, we'll have everything back to normal in no
time." With that he ran off to join the others in the library.

Abu frowned. Aladdin hadn't mentioned Iago. He was sure Iago had
grabbed the thingamajiggy right when he had, so where was he?

A familiar voice called out, "Looks like it's just you and me,

Abu turned and gawked. Standing where the parrot Iago should've been
standing, was a red haired man. His built was stocky but not
overweight and he was dressed in an elaborate outfit, the kind that
screams 'I'm self-important, look at me!'. Abu was surprised to also
see flecks of gray amongst all the gleaming red on top of his head.

Iago shifted, uncomfortably, "Stop staring at me. It's creepy.
Besides you look as weird as I do." He gestured towards a mirror on
the far wall.

Abu approached it cautiously. He wasn't sure he really wanted to see
himself, but in the end, curiosity won out. It always did. He studied
himself. He was tall...a little taller then Iago and considerable
thinner. His hair and eyes were both a medium brown and his
outfit...well it looked a lot like what Aladdin wore on adventures.
He wondered idly if Aladdin had lent it to him. This, of course would
mean he'd been naked when he transformed...and that meant Iago had
been too. He blushed furiously at that thought.

Iago frowned, "Don't be embarrassed monkeyboy. You don't look that fact, you look pretty good. For a human that is."

Abu shook his head. Had Iago just given him a compliment? That was
amazing but Abu felt the need to comment on something else, "I'm not
a monkey."

Iago shrugged, "Old habits die hard, monkey...Abu. So what are we
supposed to do, while the Terrific Trio reads dusty old books?"

Abu looked at him. He could think of lots of ways to pass the time,
none of which he could see the former parrot agreeing to do, "I don't
know. Just wait, I guess."

Iago rolled his eyes and flopped down on the floor, " city."

Abu smiled slightly. Even in human form, Iago was still Iago. He was
ever bit as loud, rude and sarcastic as ever. It was kind of

Iago noticed him smiling at him, "What are you looking so happy

Abu grinned at him, "Nothing, just thinking about how you're as
obnoxious now as you were as a parrot."

Iago glared at him, "I can go elsewhere, you know."

Abu's grin quickly faded, "No...I'm sorry. C'mon, it's not that bad.
The others will find a way to reverse it, you'll see. Until then,
we'll just have to make the best of it."

Iago sighed, "It's not the reversal that concerns's the

Abu frowned, "The inscription? What about it?"

"Think about it! What did it say?"

"Uh...'Become another but stay the same and there your fate does

"Right! Well we've become another...we're human...but we're still us.
Inside we've stayed the same. So our fate lies in our new forms...or
our own selves?"

Abu shrugged, "I don't know. What about the rest?"

Iago looked uncomfortable again, "Yeah..."

Abu stared at his feet, "But be but warned to squander this, your
love will surely die."

Iago shook his head, "We're not positive it's die. Could be something
else. Besides it doesn't apply to us, it was just a fluke we got it
at the same time. Our love? What love? I mean isn't that the
stupidest ever...heard?" He stopped and stared and the
youngish man in front of him. Abu was trying to discreetly
wipe the tears from his eyes, "Oh...Abu, I didn't mean it like...I

Abu sniffled, "You know, you're right. We mean nothing to each other.
Nothing at all."

Iago's face clouded, "I didn't say that! You' best friend.
You're one of the few who understands me. Aladdin, Jasmine, Carpet,
the Genie, they all just look down at me really. I mean they'd defend
me and deep down they care about me, I guess...but you really try to
be my friend. I'm stupid and let my big mouth get in the
way...forgive me?"

Abu looked at him, "Yeah...sure."

Iago stomped his foot, "You liar! For a former thief you are the
world's crappiest liar! You're still upset! What do you want from me?
What do you want me to do?"

Abu embraced him and held on tight, "Just don't push me away."

End of Part One

Author's Note: Please do not take this seriously...flame me if you
must but remember it's all in twisted good fun. And for the record
yes I do think they make a cute couple

Go on to Part Two

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